Anti-blogging chewing gum!!

Ever switched on TV at weird times (time slot that does not fall under prime time)?

Majority of Indian channels show Telebrands/Teleshopping – it’s a show where a bunch of happy and smiling people are selling unbelievable products.

Yes, you name it, and they have something to meet your needs.

• Glow in dark condoms (Yes, I saw this episode. They asked a short-n-slim guy to actually wear the condom like a cap on his head in order to show how it glows in dark)
• Knife that will cut your coke can, furniture and even your pets into pieces (ewwww)
• Hair dryer that will dry hair like objects from every part and pit of your body (No comments)
  
• Facial cream that will make your skin glow (I remember watching one episode where after applying the cream, that model literally gave out radiation. I’m sure she got selected for STAR WARS - 4)
  

While watching TELEBRANDS, the only thing that comes in my mind is, “Boy, all these people make me proud of the acting industry. You see, they are natural born actors…the only bad thing is that they were never able to grab the opportunity at the right time”. I think, maybe now they have given up all struggles and have decided to become on-screen sales person.

The other thing that is very common is that long toll-free number flashed on screen soon after marketing is done. “Dial the number flashing on your screen, and we’ll deliver this product in minutes. Hurry up!! Early bird will receive lot of free goodies FREEEE. So what are you waiting for? Dial the number now. It’s flashed at the bottom of your screen.”

This reminds me of late night shows I used to watch in Dubai, where some cute naked chick used to appear suddenly while watching a good movie and say something similar. For a moment, yes…you are tempted to dial the number. But for Telebrands…jeeeez, give me a break!!

Majority of the time these people try to sell products that will help you give up addiction of Smoke and alcohol. I don’t do any of these, but yes I’m addicted to blogging. Now I’m waiting for something similar to come up very soon:

Hello, guys I’m Billy Bob. Last year during X-mas, I found out that my girlfriend was cheating behind my back. To get over the depression, one friend of mine introduced me to blogging. After that my world totally changed. I enjoyed spending hours and hours at a stretch on blog, writing posts at weird hours and blog hopping on weekends. I got so addicted that I started neglecting my job, my family and pets. Until one day I realized, I was job less, my family moved somewhere else, without even commenting on my blog, where they are right now…and pets, I don’t remember where the hell they are right now. May God bless their kind soul!!

But now, things have changed yet again for me, thanks for this anti-blogging chewing gum from BOOBLE.com. Whenever I get the urge to write a post or do blog hopping, I chew this gum to take my mind off it. Now I get time to hang out with my friends after office hours and they too have given up blogging. My pets have returned back to me from the wild. However, I’m yet to track down my family, but I know once they see this Ad on TV, they are going to call me back. “Hi mom!! Hi dad. This is me Billy.”

Guys, I know what I’ve been through myself and I know while this show is being aired on your TV channel, few bloggers out there are busy writing some post for there blog. Believe me this chewing gum is going to put your life back on track. You can see happiness flowing out of my face, right here…right now. You'll see that on your face too.

The long wait of frustration and lonliess is over.
Place your order now. Number is being flashed on your screen. Hurry up!!
First 100 lucky customers will get anti-smoking chewing gum free and next 100…unlucky fellows, you’ll not get anything…so please don’t even ask for it.

Hurry up!!
Don’t think, just call on the number flashed on your screen. Mom, dad I’m waiting for your call too.

And *dare* anyone even think of writing a post on this. We reserve rights to sue if we see our brand name appear on any blog.